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Old age problems
https://paphospeople.com/ppforum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=34070
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Author:  George [ Sun Dec 16, 2018 11:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Old age problems

Firstly, apologies for the thread title!

I have a friend whose husband died almost 2 years ago. The problem is that this loving husband took care of everything during their lifetime together, meaning that his wife is still struggling to cope with the myriad letters, payments, accounts, banks, house, car problems etc etc etc. I know this is not the only such situation to arise.

So just a heads up for all couples- please share everything, please ensure that each of you is familiar with dealing with the everyday minutiae and bureaucracy of your lives so that in the sad event of losing your partner neither of you will be left to deal with mountains of paperwork that is a complete mystery to you.

Again, apologies for this topic, but I see every day the problems my friend struggles to deal with, please people put things in place so that you both know how to proceed in the event of being left on your own.

Author:  tanny [ Mon Dec 17, 2018 8:18 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

:agree

Author:  SueParc [ Mon Dec 17, 2018 9:23 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

I couldn't agree more.
No one needs that extra stress and confusion on top of losing their life partner.

Author:  vine [ Mon Dec 17, 2018 10:39 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Excellent post George :agree

Author:  exodus [ Mon Dec 17, 2018 11:24 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Very good advice George. :agree
Amos.

Author:  lazydaze [ Mon Dec 17, 2018 12:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

We thought about this a few years ago and have a file showing our solicitor, where Bank accounts are, bills coming in and where they are paid. Insurances and local taxes due. At least our children have a start.
Just in case we get wiped out together by a twin cab!

Author:  Anarita John [ Tue Dec 18, 2018 2:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Very good advice. We have found ourselves helping someone in a similar situation. Also, ensure both of you are basic computer literate as so much is done online these days. and both can access bank accounts, money transfers and other online billings.

Author:  DollyDaydream1 [ Tue Dec 18, 2018 3:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

If you own a car make sure it's in both your names otherwise the remaining partner may not be able to sell it on if needed!

Author:  emgeeb [ Tue Dec 18, 2018 6:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

My wife died in July and I'm going through the process at the moment, both our cars, although joint owned are now in probate and can't be sold. Premium Bond holding is a nightmare, as they can't be transferred to another person. If the deceased persons estate is more than five thousand pounds you may have to apply for a UK issued Grant of representation as well as a Cypriot one.

Hoops and more hoops.

Don't need it at this time.

Alan

Author:  George [ Tue Dec 18, 2018 11:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

So sorry to hear this Alan. I know the bureaucracy is a nightmare, which is partly what my friend is suffering from.

Wish you well x

Author:  George [ Tue Dec 18, 2018 11:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

John, this is another problem my friend is struggling with, she has no idea of computer literacy. In this day and age this really is a problem when one partner is left to cope alone.

Please people, think seriously of the information you may be leaving behind for your partner to sort.

Author:  Uncle D [ Wed Dec 19, 2018 10:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Something I've noticed over the years is the amount of women unable to drive or can drive but haven't done so in decades and are nervous to get behind the wheel again.
Buses are too infrequent, taxis too expensive and relying on friends giving lifts can be a burden for both parties.

Author:  Yakflyer [ Wed Dec 19, 2018 7:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Very sage advice Jaqs, but this is something I think about all the time, even though I am blessed with fairly rude health. Anything which I do of a technical or computer nature I make a point of involving my wife. Apparently stupid things like how to identify the fault/fuses/switches and get the house back on line in the event of a power-outage; how to open the electric gates in the event of power failure; how to get the computer and ancillaries up and running in the event the power goes off. I try and discuss anything and everything which relates to tasks which I carry out now...and which she would have to do in future.

A concern relates to credit cards, as when these were first taken out, decades ago, they were taken out in my name, with my wife's name as a secondary cardholder. Which means that in the event of my demise, my wife's cards might be withdrawn. But hey, you can only do so much. The most important think is that we have Wills made out by an English lawyer in Larnaca (Marion Carter) which we update every couple of years. And we are very fortunate that our daughter and family live nearby and would do whatever it takes, in the event.

Must admit that in the event of my wife passing first I would have a helluva job understanding the logic - or complete absence of - of where pots, pans and baking utensils are located in the kitchen. She's an absolute nightmare :lol:

Author:  George [ Wed Dec 19, 2018 10:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

Sensible Lloyd!


Main thing is that either you or your wife can get through the myriad of bureaucracy which governs our lives without difficulty. I've seen the effects on my neighbour and it's not good, so anything you can both put in place in case will be beneficial. You are fortunate in having your offspring on hand, so they will no doubt be in a good position to assist either of you in the event of a partners demise.

Can't offer any advice about the pots and pans etc, so maybe keep the phone numbers of nearby restaurants/takeaways to hand!!

Methinks you maybe know a lot more about your kitchen than you let on, given some of the lush recipes you post on here! Unless of course these are your wife's recipes??? In which case, get learning, fast!!

Author:  vine [ Thu Dec 20, 2018 8:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Old age problems

The wife will not let me anywhere near the kitchen since I burned the salad.

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